Birthday bashes

We celebrated Kanishk’s ninth birthday last Saturday, inviting his classmates to a tenpin bowling party. This was his fourth birthday in Australia. The first one was a quiet family affair, as we had arrived in Australia only ten days before, and didn’t know anyone in the country apart from close family. The second one was at home and all his classmates were invited. I have a vague recollection of Mum organizing some games for the kids, and little boys in blue uniform bouncing off our walls through the evening. The third party was a series of events - one a Wii party at home with select classmates, another a dinner with close family, followed by yet another dinner with friends and their families. This time around, we had run out of ideas, and simply decided to outsource the party to a bowling alley.

I don’t recall having birthday parties as a child – wonder how I let my parents get away so easily. As I approached teenage, I usually got a set of new clothes and some cash to “treat” my close friends with. On one birthday I remember receiving five rupees for each of my friends, and struggling to arrive at the best combination of treats within that budget. I think I settled on a bhel puri followed by a 500 ml bottle of Thums Up. Halfway through their Thums Up most of my friends looked like they had had enough to last them a lifetime, but they manfully stuck to finishing the bottle’s contents.

The one ritual we did follow on the birthdays (both my brother’s and mine) was to go out for a family dinner. Early June in Calcutta is monsoon time, but no matter how much it rained we would pile into our Ambassador and head out to a restaurant in the Park Street/Chowringhee area.

Many of my friends had proper birthday parties, though, with food and lots of fun & games. “Passing the parcel” was a standard fixture at these parties. I wonder if that is played anymore. I remember parties following a standard structure – hand over presents, play games (passing parcel/tailing donkey), cut cake, eat, play more games (blind man’s buff/quiz), get return gift, say goodbye. I think some parties still follow this process flow, but product differentiation has made its way into social occasions. So theme parties (Dora/pool/bowling/Harry Potter) are much more common nowadays.

I am not quite sure how to approach one’s own birthdays in middle age. Turning eighteen is a sign of maturity and entry into the adult world. Turning seventy is a milestone in a pretty long life. What emotion is turning thirty eight supposed to trigger, other than an acceptance of more grey hair (or less of any type) and one more inch to the waistline? When a college girl wishes you with a “Happy Birthday, Uncle”, you know you’re well and truly over the hill.